Back To Blogging

 

Well after a difficult couple of months,  I feel a lot better and able to resume my blogging.  A mixture of depression, my Wife's illness and the resulting care difficulties and also trying to organise a respite care package to give me some freedom. We have been assessed, but we need some equipment to be fitted to the property before we can get any carers in. We need to get some ceiling hoists fitted. But we now know what we need, so we can hopefully get things sorted soon. I'd like to have everything in place by the Summer. Here's hoping.

I won't go into any further details on the first couple of months of the year, because it's not really compatible with positive blogging, which is what I want to concentrate on. It's quite difficult for anyone trans to be positive in the current climate, with the attacks on our right to exist, the rise of the far right wing and Reform, and a far right wing lunatic in the White House, and a Labour government that seems to be intent on pandering to the right wing, to appeal to Reform voters. But rather than be miserable about it,  I took strength from the rise of the left wing and the victory of the Green Party and Hannah Spencer in the Gorten and Denton by- election. It was a victory of hope over hate, and I hope the left wing can galvanise and build on this wonderful victory. 

So we're into March, or as I call it, Mad March. March seems to always be ridiculously busy for us. We have our wedding anniversary and my Wife's birthday during this month. My Wife has a lot of dental and medical check ups during March. The car has it's MOT carried out during this month. And both the mobile hairdresser and podiatrist pay us a visit this month.  On top of this it's always a busy month in the garden. And this time around, there is all of the caregiving issues to get sorted. So it feels non stop. 

Given how busy I am, there is very little time to dress, but I'm hoping to try and get at least one short session in this month. Fingers crossed 🤞

 I'm quite excited because I have been very daring and ordered myself a pvc mini dress from the fetish clothing company, Honour. 

'Gloria' dress from Honour Clothing 

I do love shiny pvc clothes, and I always wanted a zip up dress like this. It was in a sale so I took the plunge. At some point I would like to buy some shiny thigh high platform boots to wear with it.  It's definitely not a dress for normal every day wear,  but sometimes it's good to put together a special look. Hopefully I will look good wearing it. 

This is an AI interpretation of how I hope I might look in this dress with some matching thigh boots. It's definitely a kinky look, but then I can be a little kinky sometimes, and I'm definitely not ashamed to admit it. 

I'm also thinking about getting a tattoo done. "A tattoo at your age?" I hear you cry. Well I've always liked how they look on women. So why not? The tattoo I'm thinking of is of the rose that features on the cover of the 'Violator' album by my favourite band Depeche Mode. I always thought it was a very powerful, yet feminine image, that can also be worn by a man, because of the Depeche Mode connection. I've seen a few tattoos of this design and I love them. 

The cover of 'Violator' by Depeche Mode 

I would have on my right upper arm. I think it would look good when worn with a sleeveless dress, and very feminine. I would leave the word Violator off though. Possibly use the title of the single Enjoy The Silence as in this example I found on the internet. Or I may have no words and more of the lower leaves included. After all the lyrics of 'Enjoy The Silence' do state

 "Words are very unnecessary, 

They can only do harm"

An example of the kind of tattoo I would like 

I think I'll go for black ink rather than red, because it allows for finer detail in the shading and looks better on skin than in red. And this image has been used in black on many occasions by the band. 

I know a few of my friends don't like tattoos on women, but I like them if they're feminine and not covering the woman, and  I think they look great with retro swing dresses. 

Below is an AI interpretation of how this tattoo might look on me.

AI interpretation of tattooed me

As you can see from the images on this blog post, I have been using AI to create alternative images from photos I upload into the Dola AI creator. It's a bit of fun and at times useful. I prefer to be authentic, so I won't be passing of AI images of myself  and claiming they are real  like a few people I've come across on Flickr,  but I find it useful to visualise what an outfit looks like on me sometimes, such as the image I used earlier of myself in this black pvc outfit. Another example of using AI like this, is when I wanted to know if a yellow retro swing dress would suit me. Well rather than spend money on one and being disappointed, I used Dola AI to change the colours of a dress I liked in a photo, to yellow. 

The original image in pink

And by the powers of AI, in yellow 

And the answer provided by AI is yes, yellow suits me very well. So I can now search for a yellow dress in this style, knowing it will look good on me.

So hopefully next month we are getting the survey done for the fitting of the ceiling hoists   and I hope to have them fitted and in use by early Summer. Again fingers crossed 🤞 

Next month also sees Record Store Day on Saturday the 18th and I'll be queuing up outside my nearest record shop, Lucky's Record Bar in Redruth from about 6.30am to get the records I want. I've got the Human League, Sisters Of Mercy, Empire Of The Sun, Status Quo and XTC on my hit list this year. The guy who owns the shop will make sure he has them ordered for me. But it's first come first served with no reservations allowed, hence the ungodly hour I will be queuing from. 

I'm hoping to have a few dressing opportunities, as the month is much quieter for me, and if the weather is nice, it would be nice to wear one of my vintage dresses. 

Well that's it for this bloggy catch up. Hopefully normal blogging service is resumed.

Be good my friends, and if you can't be good be careful. 

Dee 

💋💋💋

The Blog That Doesn't Blog?

 

That seems like an appropriate title for this blog at the moment. I haven't felt the motivation or had the time to write for my blog this year. Normally I would write about the month just gone, but I did want to be more positive in my blogging this year, and it really hasn't been the kind of month that has many positives in it. So I didn't write about it. There has been a difficult and ongoing situation with trying to sort out a caring package for my Wife, that will carry us forward. And the difficulties in sorting that out, have triggered a visit from the Black Dog (depression not a black labrador).

It would be easy to give up the blog, with everything that's going on at the moment, but I do enjoy writing it, and so I'm going to return to it when I can. Hopefully next month.

I apologise for not keeping up to date with the blogs I follow. Again, please bear with. 

I did manage to get a dressing session in on the first of February. This means that I'm afraid that I failed in my attempt to dress during every calender month of the year. I had two planned sessions at end of the month that were foiled by caring issues, so in the end, I was greatful to get a clear morning to spend dressed. So I do have some new pics to share,which I think are quite nice.

I will hopefully be back to full on bloggyness, next month. 

Until then I will leave you with these piccies.

Deeanna 

💋💋💋

My Hopes For This Year

 My Hopes For This Year 

(Belatedly)

So it's only a week until the end of the first month of the year, and it's rather late to be posting about my plans for the new year.  But January is always an awful month for me, so I don't really make any plans for it, as I know they could easily fall by the wayside, or get eaten up by the black dog that always seems to snap at my heels during this month.  So I tend to see my year beginning in February. Maybe I should move to China? 

One thing I'd like to achieve in 2026, is to dress fully at least once during each calender month. It seems a simple task, but I haven't achieved it since 1978, when I was a young teenager enjoying my first year of being a crossdresser. Of course, that means that I have to pull my finger out and beat my January blues to avoid falling at the first hurdle. So I'm definitely going to dress next week, come hell or high water (both of which seem entirely possible at the moment). And I'll have to try harder, not to lose my dressing momentum, which I'm afraid happened during the hot weather, last year. Dressing as my true self is so important to me, and I must continue to make the most of my opportunities. 

Last year I set an aim of going out dressed in public again. And I achieved that to a small extent, when I met up with my longstanding friend and fellow blogger, Nikki Kent. However, I feel there wasn't enough actual public interaction on this trip out. So I would like to have a proper trip out in public, and to interaction with people as Deeanna. I haven't done that since 2017. 

I hope to be able to have a few visits to my friend Veronica. Last year was a difficult one, and so I only managed one visit to her, and that visit was cut short by an incident back at home that I had to attend to. So I hope to spend some nice, uninterrupted time dressing with my friend.

The reason for my visit to Veronica in December, ending early, was that my Wife had a fall. Apart from attending medical appointments and quick trips out to the shops or the local garden centre, that was my only full day away from her and it ended early, because of her condition. That just isn't sustainable. I honestly think as things are, I'm going to end up completely depleted and breaking down in the next few months.  So we need to arrange some kind of respite care. My Wife has accepted the need for this. But she has done that before and then backtracked on the idea. And having mentioned it after the recent falls, she is now trying to brush the idea of respite care, under the carpet. So I'm determined to get something sorted out, even if she won't. So this will be the year that I get some support in my caring role.

A very important aim for this year is to improve my health and fitness as much as possible. Last year was a difficult year and I had some health problems which have caused me to lose a lot of physical strength and muscle. Given my age, this isn't good. If I don't try to turn things around now it could soon be too late. So I'm going to concentrate on building back my strength and losing as much fat as I can. I'd like to reduce my cholesterol to a safe level, without having to resort to horrible medications like statins. 

I haven't really got any outfits planned this year. I might revisit my pink vintage dress, with some cowgirl accessories to pay homage to Chappell Roan and the 'Pink Pony Club'. I'll keep my eye out for a pink fur trimmed cowgirl hat and some pink cowboy boots. 

I'm going to keep blogging and hopefully if things go well, I can keep the posts a little more positive, although I don't think I will be full on Posiblogging, given my life situation. 

I know it's going to be another difficult year, but I'm going to try to make the most of it, no matter what. 

Bring it on. 

💖💖💖

My 2025

 

The year 2025 was a definite rollercoaster ride for me. Lot's of ups. Lot's of downs. A bit of screaming. We made it to the end, just about in one piece. 

I had some plans for last year. It was supposed to be a significant year for me. Some of those plans came to pass. Other's withered and died on the vine. But in a difficult year, I did have a few high points, and achievements. 

One of my ambitions for 2025, was to dress as Deeanna in each calender month of the year. I haven't managed that before.  And I still haven't managed it. I'm afraid I fell at the first fence. January turned out to be quite a difficult month. So I didn't dress at all. So that ambition was gone for the year. 

January saw me going on a CBT course. The psychotherapy type Cognitive Behaviour Therapy, not Compulsory Bike Training or another unmentionable thing with the anachronism CBT that involves doing unmentionable things to someone's unmentionables. I'll leave you to find that one out for yourselves. I'm not going to mention the details and I certainly wouldn't want to go on a course of it.

It was a 5 week course intended to allow the NHS to tick a box that they had made a token gesture towards dealing with stress and mental health. Did it work? Yes it did. The NHS ticked the box that said it had fulfilled it's responsibilities.  Did it help me? No it didn't. It was rubbish. I didn't feel any better afterwards. I was told I could ask for a re-referal and go back on the waiting list. I didn't bother. I realised that only I can fix myself.  I've tried to get on top of my anxiety and depression this year, and I feel a little more resilient in the face of continuous trauma. 

My Wife did have a nasty fall in January,  but I managed to get her back up using our lifting equipment. 

I did get some nice dressing done in February and took a few nice photos. 

I'm a big American football fan, and my favourite team,  the Philadelphia Eagles won the Superbowl in February which I celebrated with a photo in one of my Eagles shirts.

There was another fall for my Wife to contend with in February. It happened while I was out at the dentist. I managed to get her up when I got home, but she spent 2 hours on the floor. I suggested that for future times when I'm out, we may need to arrange a respite carer to sit with her. That suggestion fell on deaf ears. 

March proved to be a ridiculously busy month with lots of medical appointments to attend for both my Wife and myself. So I didn't manage to get any dressing done. 

  One positive achievement for this month, was getting a new decked area built at the back of the house, which allows my Wife to access the garden in her wheelchair. That has been a game changer for her.

April saw a definite warming up of the weather and we had a lovely Spring, perfect for using our new decking. It was a fairly quiet, uneventful month, which I needed after a frantic few weeks. I did manage to get some dressing done. Just one session where I wore my green tiered top, which I love.

April also saw me setting up this very blog and making my first posts. It's been a wonderful experience for me, and I hope to continue with my blogging journey. 

May was a very good month for me. And a definite highlight of 2025. My friend Nikki was coming on holiday to Cornwall and we planned to meet up. Nikki and I have been friends for 16 years, but never actually met face to face. So in early May, I drove the 25 miles to the far West of Cornwall to spend a morning and have lunch with Nikki. It was wonderful to finally meet her. Hopefully we will be able to meet up again before too long, because she is a wonderful friend. 

 

Later in May, I had a lovely relaxed dressing day and wore a new dress and matching cardigan set, which is very lovely. It was a very enjoyable day and I got some lovely photos. 

 

June was a busy month and the weather was really hot. I found the Summer heat meant that I lacked a lot of motivation for dressing.  Looking back, I'm quite disappointed that I didn't dress as often during the Summer, as I hoped I would. I dressed twice towards the end of June. The first dressing session felt hurried and I got flustered and didn't enjoy it. It showed in the photos but I did get one nice photo. But it wasn't an enjoyable dressing session. I was quite upset. 

But I decided that I needed to dress again to erase the memory of a bad dressing session, so I decided to have a photo session wearing a gorgeous red pvc rainmac. Even though it was warm and sunny and in the middle of a drought. But it made me happy and got me back on track a little, although it really took a cooling of the weather in the Autumn to fully restore my dressing mojo.

July was another hot and sultry month and I only managed one dressing session. I tried on a red tailored jacket that I had bought 16 years ago, and hadn't worn for 15. And it fitted perfectly, so I got some nice photos wearing it.

August was a very busy month as we had family coming to visit. So dressing fell by the wayside for this month. But it was lovely to see family so it was mostly a good month. Sadly my Wife had another fall at the end of the month. 

And so we come to September and the start of Autumn. Autumn is always a good season for dressing, and so it proved yet again. I had a couple of vintage dresses I wanted to wear. A blue dress and a pink dress. I also wanted to try a blonde wig. So I purchased a short blonde wig from Natural Image wigs. I loved the colour but didn't feel the style suited me.

I decided to buy another blonde wig in a different style. I purchased a Sky wig, by Noriko. I love Noriko wigs. They are very good quality. This wig came from Simply Wigs. It looked amazing from the moment I first tried it on. I absolutely love it. I just had to wear it with my vintage dresses. 

On the first vintage dressing session, I wore my blue Lady Vintage dress. I really loved the photos I took of myself in this dress.

I also took a few photos in this dress with my ochre yellow faux leather biker jacket. But sadly I noticed that the outer layer of the collar was flaking off,so it was the last wear of a favourite in my wardrobe. I'll try and find a real leather replacement for it, because I have loved it. 

I still had my pink dress to wear, so I had another dressing session a few days later,and had a totally pink experience with the pink dress and matching accessories. It was a fun session. 

I decided to keep with the vintage vibe for October. But as the weather was getting colder and wetter, I wore a nice red cashmere cardigan which suited the dresses perfectly and stayed indoors. I wore two dresses. One floral one, and a polka dots dress. I got some lovely photos. 

I did have a bit of a difficult time during October and November with a hoarse voice. After two months of struggling with it, I found it was caused by the Statins that I had just been prescribed, weakening my vocal chords. Since I gave up taking them, things are rapidly improving. 

November was also a good month for dressing. I had bought a long blonde wig, on a whim, from Amazon. It was only cheap. I wore it with my red cardigan and black faux leather dress and I think it looked great. It's not the best quality, so it sheds a bit. But otherwise it's great for the money.  The outfit I wore was intended to be worn the following month, when I visited my friend Veronica. Sadly I never got to wear it on that day. But that's a story for the next month. 

I also managed to get a few more dressing sessions in and all in all, November was a good month. I took some photos in a lovely pvc raincoat that Veronica had given to me a few years ago. I love the colour. I need more of this shade in my life.

Then I took the coat off and took a few photos, showing off my gorgeous animal print dress. I absolutely love this dress.

I also took changed gear completely and dressed in a very demure style with my lovely pink twinset cardigan. It's a look i really love.

And so we arrive at December. The last month of the year, and a month of celebration. Well something that I was definitely celebrating was a visit to my friend Veronica at last. It should have been a full day together, but that wasn't to be, because my Wife unfortunately had a fall at home, and so i was called back, just after lunch. But we had a lovely morning and lunch, and it was wonderful being back in my friend's company again. Hopefully we will get a care package in place that allows me to have full uninterrupted visits in future. Thankfully we had taken some photos in the morning. 

My Wife went on to have a further 4 falls in December, which is very worrying. She normally only has about 3 falls a year. She is rapidly going downhill as regards her muscle strength and mobility. She's had 7 falls in total during 2025, which is over double, previous years.

I had one more short dressing session in December, and chose to go back to my brunette coiffed wig with a homely look in my blue cardigan and a favourite floral dress. It was the same outfit that I wore to see Nikki, back in May.

Christmas came and want. It was an ok Christmas. Not a vintage one. Not a bad one. Just an average Christmas. And before we knew it, 2025 was over.

In many ways it's been a challenging year, but on the dressing front, it's mostly been quite a positive one, although I wished I'd kept my momentum up during the hot Summer months.

2025 has been a year when the low points have been very low and the high points have been very high.  

Let's hope 2026 is a little more even.

Deeanna 

💋💋💋