Days In Salisbury

 

I  have a strong connection to the city of Salisbury, in Wiltshire. It's a beautiful city, and when I lived in Romsey, Hampshire, just a few miles from the Wiltshire border, it was so easy to get to, by car, bus or train. It was on a direct rail line and just 30 minutes by train from my home in Romsey.  Driving the 17 miles took a similar time if you avoided rush hour and the Southampton Road traffic chaos.

The city has a beautiful cathedral, with the tallest spire in the U.K, which looks very impressive. Inside you can view a copy of the Magna Carta, and a very wonderful clock (I'm beginning to sound a little like a Russian FSB assassin now. More on that later). There are two beautiful rivers running through the city, the Hampshire Avon and the Nadder, which have their confluence on the edge of the town. There is plenty of medieval architecture on show, and the more modern architecture seems to blend in well with the historic. There are beautiful parks and to the North and North West of the city, expansive and beautiful water meadows,  which offer wonderful views of the cathedral. Especially in the early morning in Spring and Autumn, when the spire  rises out of the low mist.  The city has some lovely shops, a thriving market and plenty of pubs, bars, tea rooms, coffee shops and restaurants. It's a very compact city, so very easy to get around on foot. It's one of my favourite places in the UK. 

Being so close to Romsey, made it a place that my Wife and I would often visit for a meal out  or for shopping. It was so much nicer than Southampton  which was much closer and a far bigger city, but lacked the charm of Salisbury.  

So when I began to crossdress more seriously in 2009, Salisbury was the perfect place for me to visit and spend time in. Easy to reach by train or car, and far away enough, not to worry about being seen by anyone who knows me in my male drab life.

My first visit en-femme to Salisbury was on a very cold but sunny day in early December 2009. It was only my third time out dressed.  I was a member of the UK Angels forum back then, and had been discussing going out in Salisbury with a trans woman called Sue Sherrat, who lived there. We made plans to meet. And then another couple of trans women, Louisa from Ringwood,Hampshire and Lucy Melford from Sussex also asked if they could join us. And so I drove up to Salisbury and met them in a small coffee shop on Butcher Row. We drank coffee and chatted before we headed for a mooch around the shops. I bought a blue cardigan in M&S and we visited Debenhams too. Of course Debenhams presence on the high streets of the UK is now gone, but I'm delighted to hear that the store is still a department store, having been taken over by Bradbeers, the small but very lovely department store in Romsey. I'm glad to see them thriving. Then we had a wander through the large outdoor market on the appropriately named Market Place square. And then we went to one of the pubs that has double frontage on both Market Place and Butcher Row. I think it was the Ox Row Inn, but I may be mistaken, in which case it would have been either the Market Inn or The Chough. I had a sandwich and a glass of cola. It was a nice friendly pub and we were made to feel very welcome. We then walked around to the Maltings parade of shops because they had a wonderful shop that sold cuddly toys there. I wanted to buy my Wife a toy meerkat for Christmas. They had the one she wanted, so I purchased it. The meerkat still lives with us today. 

At this point it was late afternoon, and so we said our goodbyes and I walked back to the car park on Culver Street, and drove home to Romsey. It had been a really lovely day out with good company. 

My next visit to Salisbury as Deeanna was in the February of 2010. The same group of girls who I been out in Salisbury with, the previous December, arranged to meet for a meal one evening in the Rai d'Or pub on Brown Street, which did a nice  menu of Thai inspired food.  This time we had an addition to our little group. I had been talking to a trans woman on the UK Angels,  from Andover. Back then, she was calling herself Linda, but she changed her name to Christina, or Chrissie for short, when she became a woman full time, a year later.  I invited her along and she caught the train from Andover to Salisbury. As the last train would be long departed by the time that we finished our evening, I had promised to drive Linda/Chrissie home to Andover, and then drive down to Romsey through the Test Valley.  It was her first time out dressed and I'm so glad that I persuaded her to join us. We all had a lovely evening with good food and conversation. I didn't get any photos of these early meet ups. I know Lucy took some, but I never got sent any copies.  This was the last time I saw Lucy, as we never managed to be able to get our diaries to match after that. I met Louisa a few times after that, but she went into stealth mode when she began her transition, and I don't know what happened to her. I've included a photo that I took at home, which shows me just before I headed for my evening out in Salisbury. 

I had a few more solo trips to Salisbury as Deeanna, to do some shopping. On a couple of occasions I met up with Sue Sherrat on her lunch break for a quick coffee. She worked in one of the cities big stores. I didn't take photos when I was out very much, so I haven't got any photos of these solo trips out.

In November of 2010 my friend from London,  Sue Richmond mentioned the possibility of a day out in Salisbury together. I mentioned it to Sue Sherrat and Chrissie, who by now had dropped Linda as a name. Lucy was otherwise engaged and I couldn't get hold of Louisa, so it would be myself, Sue Richmond, Sue Sherrat and Chrissie who met that day. I must admit that I'd been having a bit of a tough time with my dysphoria and my dressing.  I had a few days off work and I had dressed on the day before my trip to Salisbury, and not enjoyed it. I felt very out of sorts. I thought about crying off. But on the day, I pulled on my big girls pants and got myself onto that train and off I went. It turned out to be a very mixed bag of a day. We agreed to meet in the Railway Tavern (now renamed Hettie Bells). Sue Sherrat was waiting outside of the train station for me, and we crossed the road to the pub. It was a bit early for alcohol, so we had a coffee as we waited for the others. Once we were all assembled we walked down into the city centre. Sue Richmond and Chrissie hadn't had a warm drink yet, so we headed to St Thomas Square and Cawardines cafe for teas and coffees. It's a favourite with Sue R and myself and the others seemed to enjoy it too. I can remember having a very nice conversation with an elderly lady in the queue for the toilets in there.  Chrissie needed to visit the Post Office, so headed there afterwards.  We did some shopping and sightseeing and then headed to lunch at Zizzi's Italian restaurant. This is the same restaurant that in 2018 featured in the assassination attempt on the Russian dissident Sergei Skripal. Thankfully there was no Novochuk nerve toxin about when we visited. We had a lovely relaxed lunch and then walked up to the cathedral. Here we had to say goodbye to Sue Sherrat, who had to pick her daughter up from school. Chrissie, Sue R and I went into the cathedral for a look around. I have been inside it many times before. I love old churches and cathedrals, despite being an atheist. They are such beautiful and peaceful places, and this one is definitely a favourite of mine. After our cathedral visit, we walked over to the lovely Cathedral Close, where we took this photo of the three of us.

Left to right,  Deeanna, Chrissie, Sue Richmond 

Up until now it had been a really nice day. But that was about to change. We walked back down to the centre of Salisbury, and as we walked past the Poultry Cross, a street vendor began shouting very loud transphobic abuse at us. It was awful. I put a brave face on it, but given that I was already a little lacking in confidence at that moment, it really unsettled me. We carried on and ignored it and kept our heads held high, and went for a warm beverage and a slice of cake in Debenhams. It was the first actual abuse I received, and thankfully I've never received any since. We ended the day by walking up to the train station where we said our goodbyes, and I caught the train home to Romsey.  I have very mixed feelings, looking back on this day. Most of the day was lovely,  but the transphobic incident, in a city I regarded as safe, really did unsettle me. But overall the good moments of the day outweighed the bad bits.

I next visited Salisbury as Deeanna on a Saturday night in late February 2011. I went for a meal at the Rai d'Or with Chrissie and her wife, and Sue Sherrat. I picked Chrissie and her wife, and took them home again afterwards. As with the last time we ate there, it was wonderful.  If you like Thai, Oriental or Indian food, you will find something to your taste on their menu. It was nice being able to eat as much as I wanted, because I was in training for a marathon and due to do a 15 mile run, the next day, so I knew I would burn it off. I just made sure my choice was carb heavy. As ever we had a nice relaxed conversation and it was a lovely evening.  Again I didn't get any photos while I was out, but I took these photos before I headed out.

 

I had a few solo dressed trips out shopping in Salisbury during 2011, but I didn't meet up with anyone. And later in 2011 I found myself having to stop my visits to Salisbury, while dressed as Deeanna. But I was going to be seeing a lot more of the city. In October 2011, the company I worked for in Romsey, went bankrupt  and I found a new job, working in Salisbury. So now I was working in the city, I felt it best not to socialise as Deeanna. So my visits came to an end.

However I got to spend a lot of time in this beautiful city, and would go jogging around the city and across the water meadows, after work. In my lunch break, I used to stroll along the river or walk into the city to sit on a bench and eat my lunch.  Sometimes I used to sit on a bench at The Maltings. Imagine my surprise in 2018, when I saw this very bench on the news after Russian exile, Sergei Skripal and his daughter were found suffering from nerve toxin poisoning by Russian FSB agents. 

I gave up work to look after my disabled wife in March 2014, And I haven't been back to Salisbury since. I hope that I get to go back as Deeanna one day.  It's a wonderful city and it has played such an important part in my life.

Dee

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